41 lines
2.2 KiB
Markdown
41 lines
2.2 KiB
Markdown
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do you feel the wind watching you?
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the moon's monsoon exhibitions
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as wraiths consume our wrinkled bodies
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beyond venn diagrams, the disjunction between you and yours,
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vivisected and given a patch of drywall for you to become.
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when the holes open, do you confess them to the counselor?
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three chairs are juxtaposed in the crowded bus; you, alone in the middle,
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wishing for an oar, a first mate to be your deliverance.
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you wish for him as your helmsman,
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a hard port to starboard,
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howling wind howling sin, harshly wailing,
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"you aren't welcome here, you do not belong,"
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"existence is a rebellion, an unforgivable mistake,"
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"you'll fail, you'll give up, you'll deal in, you will sink anyway."
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as the seafoam, chopped in the wake of your disfigured course,
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licks the lobe of your ear, trailing slime,
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like the hungry men, in your bed before you learned to drive.
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you only know alone in that packed room of better-looking brown,
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marooned on a windswept island in the queer sea,
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a hanger-on in the moonlight, a remnant of the party, an S.O.S.,
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yearning for a ship to pick you up,
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for a lyft from a merman to be your handsome, aquatic uber,
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for mitski's siren song to blare about the knife,
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for peering over trenches, and fantasizing about the deep.
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you pass charybdis and scylla, girl-bossing your new odyssey,
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a chorus of indie filipino american girl jams, chanting over your skiff.
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your red blood stripes into the murky blue, tattooing the sea with a dividing line,
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your sails propelled, filled by bad habits and destructive behaviors,
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your tongue eagerly engaged to the man from the sea,
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your abba interlude, the remastered fantasy soundtrack, fading into the background,
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as he, ocean lover, too recesses into your abyssal imagination.
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awash into reality, the tyrannical sofa in the counselor's office chokes you.
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ripped apart by hegemonic tides, delusions, contemptuous breeze,
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the friendships, the partnerships, the mentorships, the relationships,
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the neglected ships in your despaired disrepair.
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built for escape and abandoned when worn.
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the ships you ride
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to escape.
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