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--- ---
title: 'Error 404: Not found' title: "Error 404: Not found"
layout: single.njk layout: single.njk
permalink: '404.html' permalink: "404.html"
--- ---
# Error 404 # Error 404
Uh-oh! Couldn't find that URL on this server. Maybe you had a typo? Uh-oh! Couldn't find that URL on this server. Maybe you had a typo?
[Go home](/) [Go home](/)

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@ -8,12 +8,12 @@ eleventyNavigation:
--- ---
# Me # Me
My name's Gil ([he/they](https://en.pronouns.page/@kalanggam)). I'm a Filipino american wizard, spell developer, and cowboy mage based in the southern united states. My name's Gil ([he/they](https://en.pronouns.page/@kalanggam)). I'm a Filipino american wizard, spell developer, and cowboy mage based in the southern united states.
I am a writer, managing editor of a local grassroots newspaper, community organizer, and game developer. I am a writer, managing editor of a local grassroots newspaper, community organizer, and game developer.
Professionally I am working as a part-time/seasonal tax preparer, but in the past I've worked as a student leadership educator, a student ambassador for my school's DEI program, and *very* briefly in a package delivery warehouse. Professionally I am working as a part-time/seasonal tax preparer, but in the past I've worked as a student leadership educator, a student ambassador for my school's DEI program, and _very_ briefly in a package delivery warehouse.
I'm also a leading member of the ogra.ph collective, a group of people interested in alternatives to mainstream corporate-operated social media. Together we host a microblogging platform called [hol.ogra.ph](https://hol.ogra.ph) and we have a Git service called [ide.ogra.ph](https://ide.ogra.ph). I'm also a leading member of the ogra.ph collective, a group of people interested in alternatives to mainstream corporate-operated social media. Together we host a microblogging platform called [hol.ogra.ph](https://hol.ogra.ph) and we have a Git service called [ide.ogra.ph](https://ide.ogra.ph).
@ -27,4 +27,4 @@ You can take a look at my [journal](/journal), teleport through [portals](/porta
This mystic plane was created primarily using [Eleventy](https://www.11ty.dev/), a static site generator, and [Sass](https://sass-lang.com/), a CSS extension language. Hosting is provided by [IONOS](https://www.ionos.com/). All of the templates were made by me and the source scrolls are [publicly available](https://ide.ogra.ph/gil/gil.ink). This website additionally contains no trackers. The only cookie this website will ever use is one that stores your preferred theme. Besides a bit of JS to provide theme stuff, my website is mostly static HTML and CSS files. This mystic plane was created primarily using [Eleventy](https://www.11ty.dev/), a static site generator, and [Sass](https://sass-lang.com/), a CSS extension language. Hosting is provided by [IONOS](https://www.ionos.com/). All of the templates were made by me and the source scrolls are [publicly available](https://ide.ogra.ph/gil/gil.ink). This website additionally contains no trackers. The only cookie this website will ever use is one that stores your preferred theme. Besides a bit of JS to provide theme stuff, my website is mostly static HTML and CSS files.
The fonts used are [Kurale](https://github.com/etunni/kurale) (display) and [Inclusive Sans](https://www.oliviaking.com/inclusivesans/feature) (body). Both fonts are licensed under the [SIL Open Font License, Version 1.1](https://openfontlicense.org/open-font-license-official-text/). The fonts used are [Kurale](https://github.com/etunni/kurale) (display) and [Inclusive Sans](https://www.oliviaking.com/inclusivesans/feature) (body). Both fonts are licensed under the [SIL Open Font License, Version 1.1](https://openfontlicense.org/open-font-license-official-text/).

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--- ---
title: '/carry' title: "/carry"
layout: single.njk layout: single.njk
lastmod: 2025-02-20T02:26:34.00-06:00 lastmod: 2025-02-20T02:26:34.00-06:00
eleventyNavigation: eleventyNavigation:
key: '/carry' key: "/carry"
parent: '/slashes' parent: "/slashes"
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title: 'Changelog' title: "Changelog"
layout: single.njk layout: single.njk
lastmod: 2025-05-12T01:31:00.00-05:00 lastmod: 2025-05-12T01:31:00.00-05:00
eleventyNavigation: eleventyNavigation:
key: 'Changelog' key: "Changelog"
parent: '/slashes' parent: "/slashes"
--- ---
# Changelog # Changelog
@ -12,11 +12,13 @@ eleventyNavigation:
This is a list of changes to my website, organized by date. This is a list of changes to my website, organized by date.
## 0.0.1 (pub. 2025-04-28) ## 0.0.1 (pub. 2025-04-28)
- Made basic setup - Made basic setup
- Added CSS reset, see *Piccalilli*'s [A (more) Modern CSS Reset](https://piccalil.li/blog/a-more-modern-css-reset/) - Added CSS reset, see _Piccalilli_'s [A (more) Modern CSS Reset](https://piccalil.li/blog/a-more-modern-css-reset/)
- First slashpages, see [/slashes](/slashes) and [slashpages.net](https://slashpages.net/) - First slashpages, see [/slashes](/slashes) and [slashpages.net](https://slashpages.net/)
## 0.0.2 (pub. 2025-05-01) ## 0.0.2 (pub. 2025-05-01)
- Used fonts [Kurale](https://github.com/etunni/kurale) (display, headers), [Inclusive Sans](https://www.oliviaking.com/inclusivesans) (sans serif, body) - Used fonts [Kurale](https://github.com/etunni/kurale) (display, headers), [Inclusive Sans](https://www.oliviaking.com/inclusivesans) (sans serif, body)
- Overhauled entire style - Overhauled entire style
- Gave unique layouts to home and about pages, moved layout Sass to its own directory - Gave unique layouts to home and about pages, moved layout Sass to its own directory
@ -24,4 +26,4 @@ This is a list of changes to my website, organized by date.
- Created 404 page - Created 404 page
- Added badges to frontpage - Added badges to frontpage
- Adjusted Open Graph metadata, e.g. separating site name from title into its own property - Adjusted Open Graph metadata, e.g. separating site name from title into its own property
- Added [Journal](/journal) - Added [Journal](/journal)

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eleventyNavigation: eleventyNavigation:
key: '/feeds' key: '/feeds'
parent: '/slashes' parent: '/slashes'
--- ---

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eleventyNavigation: eleventyNavigation:
key: '/ideas' key: '/ideas'
parent: '/slashes' parent: '/slashes'
--- ---

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@ -3,12 +3,12 @@ title: "Stream of consciousness 1"
layout: single.njk layout: single.njk
lastmod: 2025-05-12T00:31:00.00-05:00 lastmod: 2025-05-12T00:31:00.00-05:00
tags: tags:
- post - post
--- ---
# Stream of consciousness 1 # Stream of consciousness 1
This is my first public attempt at stream of consciousness. Now I dont *feel* as creative of a mind as I mightve been as a kid. Somewhere between now and adolescence I suppose Ive become caught up in life and the world. Perhaps I still have a creative spirit, but Ive been experiencing so much blockage with the creative process lately that I feel completely disconnected from it. Its like when you look at an empty canvas or a blank page, and your mind goes just as blank. I get a bit paralyzed at the thought of actually creating something, unless I come prepared with an already well-formed idea. It could be just that my inner critic is taking over before I even begin. This is my first public attempt at stream of consciousness. Now I dont _feel_ as creative of a mind as I mightve been as a kid. Somewhere between now and adolescence I suppose Ive become caught up in life and the world. Perhaps I still have a creative spirit, but Ive been experiencing so much blockage with the creative process lately that I feel completely disconnected from it. Its like when you look at an empty canvas or a blank page, and your mind goes just as blank. I get a bit paralyzed at the thought of actually creating something, unless I come prepared with an already well-formed idea. It could be just that my inner critic is taking over before I even begin.
Thats precisely why I want to start writing more stream of consciousness, so that I can silence my inner critic, unlearn that sense of “cringe” that inhibits me from creating, and develop my creative process more — which itself is part of the art and art in its own right. To me and many others, art is a means of touching truth, a way to convey the soul of something, someone, or the world around us. I feel that learning to express myself authentically and with less restraint is essential to creating, since I am not as capable of revealing other peoples truths as I can my own. Thats precisely why I want to start writing more stream of consciousness, so that I can silence my inner critic, unlearn that sense of “cringe” that inhibits me from creating, and develop my creative process more — which itself is part of the art and art in its own right. To me and many others, art is a means of touching truth, a way to convey the soul of something, someone, or the world around us. I feel that learning to express myself authentically and with less restraint is essential to creating, since I am not as capable of revealing other peoples truths as I can my own.
@ -16,4 +16,4 @@ Knowing that, I chose to frame this writing with two quotes from Tita Lacambra-A
> “Actually my poetry was a nocturnal activity taking the place of evening prayers. It was an attempt to tie together, to rationalize all the internal and external happenings of ones life into a sensible whole. It was a try at preserving my own identity and sanity in my given space, role, and environment.” > “Actually my poetry was a nocturnal activity taking the place of evening prayers. It was an attempt to tie together, to rationalize all the internal and external happenings of ones life into a sensible whole. It was a try at preserving my own identity and sanity in my given space, role, and environment.”
Ive always seen myself as a writer and a poet at heart, mostly because I am desperate to express some parcel of the truth, to see the world as it is and be seen by it as I am, to connect with the tapestry that links our souls together and with the world around us. I know Ive touched it before and often, which makes moments of disconnection and blockage all the more frustrating, but each time Ive kept steadfast in my hope that I would be able to connect with the soul of the universe again. I am comforted by knowing that every relationship and every life has its highs and lows, the creative process ebbs and it flows. It doesnt mean any less that I would like to spend more time involved in the truth, so even in low spirits I can keep a strong connection to the human and to the divine. To me, its part of the point of creating—so that others might find a portal to the divine, and not just one in my work but within themselves, other people, the world around, nature, and so on. So that others might see the world too as a moving whole, a beautiful tempest of “glorious miscellanea” (this is the title of an album by Filipino-Canadian artist Ruru that always lingers in my mind). Ive always seen myself as a writer and a poet at heart, mostly because I am desperate to express some parcel of the truth, to see the world as it is and be seen by it as I am, to connect with the tapestry that links our souls together and with the world around us. I know Ive touched it before and often, which makes moments of disconnection and blockage all the more frustrating, but each time Ive kept steadfast in my hope that I would be able to connect with the soul of the universe again. I am comforted by knowing that every relationship and every life has its highs and lows, the creative process ebbs and it flows. It doesnt mean any less that I would like to spend more time involved in the truth, so even in low spirits I can keep a strong connection to the human and to the divine. To me, its part of the point of creating—so that others might find a portal to the divine, and not just one in my work but within themselves, other people, the world around, nature, and so on. So that others might see the world too as a moving whole, a beautiful tempest of “glorious miscellanea” (this is the title of an album by Filipino-Canadian artist Ruru that always lingers in my mind).

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@ -3,7 +3,7 @@ title: "Stream of consciousness 2"
layout: single.njk layout: single.njk
lastmod: 2025-05-12T00:34:00.00-05:00 lastmod: 2025-05-12T00:34:00.00-05:00
tags: tags:
- post - post
--- ---
# Stream of consciousness 2 # Stream of consciousness 2
@ -14,4 +14,4 @@ This time is yet another where we are confronted with the darker aspects of the
Our societies are big, but our villages have become small. We have to grow our village and nurture it. We have to pool together our material resources, raise our spirits, and foster connection, so that we can resist the forces of domination, control, and violence, and the impulses that lead to them. If we want to resist them, there is no out from the work of truth-telling and holding ourselves and others accountable to justice and to reality; this is a condition of our freedom, just as our freedom rests on the freedom of all others. We can't liberate ourselves if we aren't in right relationship to each other and to the world around us. We can't be in right relationship to each other without acting against senseless harm, cruelty, and violence. We can't work against these without also acknowledging ourselves as participants and perpetrators in harm and violence against other humans. The bystander who watches another's abuse or murder and does nothing to prevent it or respond to it is an abuser or murderer in their own way. We have to reject narratives that enable us to claim a false innocence, propaganda that lionizes us or aggrandizes our acts. Our societies are big, but our villages have become small. We have to grow our village and nurture it. We have to pool together our material resources, raise our spirits, and foster connection, so that we can resist the forces of domination, control, and violence, and the impulses that lead to them. If we want to resist them, there is no out from the work of truth-telling and holding ourselves and others accountable to justice and to reality; this is a condition of our freedom, just as our freedom rests on the freedom of all others. We can't liberate ourselves if we aren't in right relationship to each other and to the world around us. We can't be in right relationship to each other without acting against senseless harm, cruelty, and violence. We can't work against these without also acknowledging ourselves as participants and perpetrators in harm and violence against other humans. The bystander who watches another's abuse or murder and does nothing to prevent it or respond to it is an abuser or murderer in their own way. We have to reject narratives that enable us to claim a false innocence, propaganda that lionizes us or aggrandizes our acts.
To love others and ourselves in a way that is true demands truth, honesty, responsibility, care, and commitment. While the autocrat, the dictator, the emperor, the fascist, and their servants and functionaries work against truth, take no responsibility for anyone other than their own glory, exploit others, coerce, intimidate, brutally force, hone apathy, and thrive on building an indifferent, unconscious world; we must raise consciousness and improve material circumstances for all, in order to build a world in which all may live, one in which it will be easier to love. To love others and ourselves in a way that is true demands truth, honesty, responsibility, care, and commitment. While the autocrat, the dictator, the emperor, the fascist, and their servants and functionaries work against truth, take no responsibility for anyone other than their own glory, exploit others, coerce, intimidate, brutally force, hone apathy, and thrive on building an indifferent, unconscious world; we must raise consciousness and improve material circumstances for all, in order to build a world in which all may live, one in which it will be easier to love.

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@ -3,7 +3,7 @@ title: "Stream of consciousness 3"
layout: single.njk layout: single.njk
lastmod: 2025-05-12T00:40:00.00-05:00 lastmod: 2025-05-12T00:40:00.00-05:00
tags: tags:
- post - post
--- ---
# Stream of consciousness 3 # Stream of consciousness 3
@ -16,4 +16,4 @@ I have a mental image related to this. I tend to view our habits, the system of
We are often not fully content with our current situations, and that discontent seems to force us into moments of crisis, moments where we question our habits and our relationships with others and our stories we tell about ourselves. Its like life telling us we have to abandon something in order for things to change. The life we had has to die for the life we want to be born. And it doesnt always mean succeeding at growth, or even that we want to grow in the first place. I wonder if our growth, the shifting and changing of our personalities, is like evolution. Like evolution is a messy series of accidents not always beneficial but often purposeful, we grow into versions of ourselves tailored to the environment we find ourselves in. Our purpose evolves just as our biology does to adapt to the earth we call home. We are often not fully content with our current situations, and that discontent seems to force us into moments of crisis, moments where we question our habits and our relationships with others and our stories we tell about ourselves. Its like life telling us we have to abandon something in order for things to change. The life we had has to die for the life we want to be born. And it doesnt always mean succeeding at growth, or even that we want to grow in the first place. I wonder if our growth, the shifting and changing of our personalities, is like evolution. Like evolution is a messy series of accidents not always beneficial but often purposeful, we grow into versions of ourselves tailored to the environment we find ourselves in. Our purpose evolves just as our biology does to adapt to the earth we call home.
So then, life is never truly linear, and it comes with its own side quests and excursions. It gets complicated, since our lives are always intertwining with each other, and the more moving parts there are, the harder it is to discern what is actually going on. I wouldnt really say that anyone “fails forward” generally, but more like we are slowly discovering (or not discovering) new selves to become. We have the option to become more and more conscious of ourselves and the realities we inhabit. Not everyone is open to this process of discovery, but if you commit to it, maybe that is a way to connect more with our human nature — by simply noticing how we are alive and so is the world, all the ways that is true and all the beauty in and around us. And maybe by embracing this spiritual growth in ourselves and in others, we become closer to love, loving ourselves and others. So then, life is never truly linear, and it comes with its own side quests and excursions. It gets complicated, since our lives are always intertwining with each other, and the more moving parts there are, the harder it is to discern what is actually going on. I wouldnt really say that anyone “fails forward” generally, but more like we are slowly discovering (or not discovering) new selves to become. We have the option to become more and more conscious of ourselves and the realities we inhabit. Not everyone is open to this process of discovery, but if you commit to it, maybe that is a way to connect more with our human nature — by simply noticing how we are alive and so is the world, all the ways that is true and all the beauty in and around us. And maybe by embracing this spiritual growth in ourselves and in others, we become closer to love, loving ourselves and others.

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{% for post in collections.post reversed %} {% for post in collections.post reversed %}
<li>{{ post.date | date: "%Y-%m-%d" }}: <a href="{{ post.url }}">{{ post.data.title }}</a></li> <li>{{ post.date | date: "%Y-%m-%d" }}: <a href="{{ post.url }}">{{ post.data.title }}</a></li>
{% endfor %} {% endfor %}
</ol> </ol>

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key: "/now" key: "/now"
parent: "/slashes" parent: "/slashes"
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eleventyNavigation: eleventyNavigation:
key: '/tip' key: '/tip'
parent: '/slashes' parent: '/slashes'
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eleventyNavigation: eleventyNavigation:
key: '/uses' key: '/uses'
parent: '/slashes' parent: '/slashes'
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eleventyNavigation: eleventyNavigation:
key: '/why' key: '/why'
parent: '/slashes' parent: '/slashes'
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